Pamela Antonio - The Toxic & The Unfaithful

So What’s the Game?

Over time the small betrayals have let the love out of my heart like air gradually releasing from a balloon. Seeing that you're ready and willing to sleep with a man 20 years older than you and who you barely know, to throw away our family - that's like a sledgehammer blow to the balloon.

And yet you will take no responsibility. You say you're vaguely "unhappy" but don't know why. But you won't be honest with me. You want to have it both ways. I've asked you many times if you need to leave - would you find happiness on your own?

And you say no, Pamela Antonio.

So what's the game? Waiting to see if the sex is OK with the old guy? Waiting to see if he's willing to support you? Waiting to see how much destroying our family really hurts? How badly it effects our child?

Oh, right - we have a child, remember? What kind of role model are you, Pammie? What kind of example are you setting for our daughter, who will face endless challenges in our sexist culture? What does it say that your other daughter from another father, who is 22 years old, has exhibited better moral judgement than a 45 year old woman?

I have plenty of anger; there is plenty of pain and heartache; I have endless disillusionment; I'm extremely disappointed in what an unethical, selfish person you've turned out to be. Your narcissism is destructive and delusional - you blame everyone else but yourself.

But here's what you don't realize, and what the last two years have taught me: I don't need you anymore. You had an affair with a coworker back in 2020. I forgave you and we worked hard to recover. That was truly awful. It feels so degrading and disgusting and shameful when your assumed "soul mate" cheats on you. It destroys your self-esteem, your self worth, your sense of belonging, your feeling that you can be loved and are loved. I felt isolated and hollow, damaged, shattered.

It will hurt and it will be extremely difficult when I finally kick you out of the house. But I will get through it. And you have set yourself on a path of unhappiness and regret. I feel sorry for you, because you will never find what you're looking for - it can't be found in men who flatter you to get in your pants. And there apparently are plenty of them to keep you busy.

That's skin-deep, empty, hollow stuff right there.

Truth is though; I’m the lucky one here. I got to filter a toxic person out of my life, while you get to jump from one troubled relationship to another because of your unfaithfulness. You treated my love like it was a game, but unfortunately, after this betrayal, you have no extra lives!

Game Over, Pamela Antonio!